Tuesday, April 10, 2007

Rain Rain Go Away

Oh, you are probably giggling to yourself because here I sit in Florida, in less than 24 hours will be sitting in the San Juan airport awaiting Leah's arrival, and we've been blessed with rain! It's my own special birthday gift from Oregon. Someone needs to fess and come clean...who wished this Oregon birthday surprise for me. Come on!!! I'm living in Florida and this is what I get for my birthday? And my 30th at that!!! I called Leah 2 hours ago (as I was running around scattered trying to tie up all the loose ends) and asked her if she'd checked P.R. weather. Can you imagine her response...she started laughing under her breath, "Yeah." I knew what the next words would be out of her mouth, "It's supposed to rain, BUT it will be 88 degrees." :) I have started to believe, based on experiences throughout my life, rain makes for better memories. If it rains, I will remember this trip that much more. When we were growing up, the camping trips I remember are the ones we got soaked! I even ruined my new pink velcro shoes because they got wet and I put them too close to the fire...they melted. Do you remember that mom? The track practices where it poured and we got soaked...those were the times you'd find us on the football field ruining any pair of white socks on our feet. The mud puddles were too enticing not to go slip-n-sliding!

I noticed in the last few blogs I've alluded to some "writings" that I've done over the past few months and that I may post soon. I realize at times I tend to be more vulnerable than others and most often I'm worried about how you will interpret what my heart says through my fingers. So, I let my mind filter that and share bits and pieces. I guess I'm being protective, of you? of me? I'm not entirely sure. But I do know that I don't want mom and Nik calling me up worried! (I love you both) and thinking they need to buy a ticket to get me home! LOL So, with that in mind, I have filtered! I really value authenticity and know that you know me better through that...so, I promise to be authetic with a hint of filter. :)

My pastor here, Ken, is an extremely compassionate, intuitive person and for the last 7 or more months he has continually checked in on me knowing that the move and then the move and then the other move were a weary time for me. He will walk over to my cubby in the office every so often and say, "How's your heart?" or "Your eyes don't look too full today...?" I guess I share that to let you know that I have been cared for so overwhelmingly. So when I say I'm writing thoughts my heart needs to express, but that I'm not sharing...I've got some good folks seeing my heart on my sleeve and making sure I'm still standing if not sometimes leaning on one of them or one of you. (Did you know you can lean long distance and you might not even know I'm leaning on you.) ;)

Ok and one for some laughter... I've wanted to apologize to my brother and my mom and dad. You know that endlessly circulating email that says something like if I knew then what I know now etc etc I'd __________ (fill in the blank) sit and listen longer, play with my kids more etc . You know the email. Well, the one that always makes me laugh is the "I'd ride with the windows down and not care about my hair!" It always makes me laugh. Eric, Mom, Dad-I'm sorry I always determined that the windows should be rolled up so my hair wouldn't move! :) I've learned to enjoy the wind in my hair over the past 10 or so years and I promise (if it isn't freezing out) we can ride with the windows down! I love you guys and turning 30 and realizing the stupid stuff of early life makes me love you that much more for putting up with ME!

There are so many people, and if you're reading this you are automatically included, that are so precious to me...I considered writing 30 cards to those who have been so dear, but then realized I can't stop at 30 so how do I begin. (Don't laugh, this was one of those thoughts I have when I am seconds from sleep.) Nor do I have the right words to say thanks, but I'll thank God and ask Him to bless you on my birthday because you have been a gift in my life.
Love you all!

So now, I'm off! Next post will be packed with Puerto Rico!

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