Monday, March 31, 2008

Floating

They are there. I can sense them, lingering...almost taunting me, "Catch us if you can!"...Yes, the questions floating in my head. I'm not avoiding them, at least that's what I tell myself. No really, I am not. I'm completely comfortable with any crazy thoughts trying to find there way down into concrete words in the form of questions. Not sure if that really makes any sense!

How can I say...

I have so many questions floating around in my head. On most occasions, I've not given them an opportunity to become more than fleeting, half thoughts. Not because I don't think I can answer them. No, I have plenty of answers. I just don't think they need to be asked. It came to light on one particular stretch, driving in the desert of AZ or CA, Lindy at the wheel, Steph staring out the window waiting for the questions to jump on her back and start dragging her down, ready to muscle through and hold her chin up, keep it together, it all happens for a reason...and then another One stands in and the only thought that lingers are the words, "And I trust in You." No need to ask questions if you trust.

These words come at the end of a Psalm, as if they are an afterthought and a reminder. Not reminding God that the writer trusts in Him ---"Hey God, remember me? And don't forget I trust You!"---, but I really think for the writer himself to be reminded,---"Oh that's right, I do trust You."

I'm sitting in a place I would not have planned. I sense the good in this and the excitement of what truly trusting in a God whose words I often read can do. It feels horrible and delightful often at about the same time. I want to squeeze the life out of life and God wants to pour life into it. I feel like I already know the ending to the story...it's a beautiful ending! It's the chapters in the middle that I need to learn to allow Him to write. So what if for the rest of my life the only home I know is in familiar faces and never physical places. I'd be ecstatic at sharing the journey with a million people...then again, whom am I to write this story! I can help, but only by prayer!

Thursday, March 27, 2008

Over the bayou and through the bugs...

Many hours in a car make man very weary! Today's city pick: New Orleans. A quick stop to drop in for coffee and beignets in the French Quarter and we were off again. The traveling has been easy and we are in Austin TX tonight. Looking forward to a slow morning tomorrow to take in some of the city and then on the road again.

Wednesday, March 26, 2008

God loves the details!

Our blond moment for this trip...
Steph-"Georgia, why are we in Georgia? Did we miss something?"
Lindy-"Let me look at the map (laughing)!"
Steph-"Georgia on my mind! How did we miss I-10?"

Ok, just a few miles too far on I-75 due to two old friends so engrossed in conversation and catching up on the heart issues that we cruised on by!

I have had the most interesting week so far...random divine encounter in a coffee shop led to fueling the passion and direction of my heart, even if ever so slightly. Today, waiting at the airport for Lindy, I ran into an old Oregon State campus pastor who happens to live in Orlando and is also headed back to Portland! God loves the details! My heart swells with encouragement this week..."For I know the plans, I will determine your steps, I will never leave you, faith...sure of what is hoped for-certain of the unseen."

Laying my head for rest in Mobile Alabama.

Tuesday, March 18, 2008

I haven't posted in a while...I've missed sharing about life on here, but have been living in the silence between these posts. It, life, continues to be a ride. Eight days and I'll be setting the compass W-NW. Honestly, torn between two sides of the country...makes me want to take a plane south! Don't worry mom, as long as gas doesn't hit $4 before next week, I'll be with Lindy when she returns. I'm headed back to Oregon for the summer, a lay over as I pray about future stuff. I'm really good at planning and then asking God to work things out...am trying this time to pray, and only pray, without adding parameters to any kind of plan. Many are the plans of my heart...so many that each week it seems to change.

Been busy, busy enjoying people. I flew to Kansas a week ago, with Greg and Mary Kay, to visit the recently relocated Erin and Steve. It was a much needed, wonderful time! The whole weekend felt like one big, warm hug. We were fortunate enough to spend some time out in the country, some old friends of Greg and Mary Kay, and I can't explain how wonderful it felt to sit in front of a fire and sip on coffee all morning long! I should have melted, but I couldn't peel myself away from the cozy fire. Kansas/Kansas City...not what I thought, really a great place to experience.

This past Sunday, I convinced the two gals I mentor to accompany me on an adventure. Since moving to Florida, I realized this is the only state you can capture both the sunrise and sunset over the ocean/sea (let me know if you know otherwise) and I wanted to see it all in the same day. We grabbed Dunkin' Donuts early and made it to Cocoa Beach with time to spare. It was a beautiful sunrise.


The sunset, after a longer drive to Clearwater, was a little less to scream about. A few minutes before sunset, a wave of fog came over the whole beach. It was eerie and felt like a whiteout. Still, we laughed and enjoyed ourselves! Yes, below was our sunset.

I'm thankful these girls were troopers, Meghan and MacKenzie. It would have been a dull day if I'd been on my own!